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This is a situation in life, and it makes somebody feel better or worse for having read it, so be it. You wanted things from me, and I wanted love. You let me fool myself into thinking I had it, and when I started putting myself first, you'd had enough. You said I'd been acting like an asshole, but instead I think I was just acting like a regular human being who had somehow managed to detach my lips from your ass, and who was understandably a bit preoccupied and hurt by the situation, and so if I wasn't present it wasn't intentional- my love was still strong.
I always thought that if I just gave you more of the things you wanted and needed, you'd love me. That was wrong, it just made you want to keep me around. You still haven't told me what I did wrong, but I think I know. If it's what I think it is, your reaction says everything.
That's enough to temper the blow and make me feel that it's not as much of a loss as it would have been a year ago. If it's something else, you're going to need to learn how to speak up about what's bothering you, or you'll never have a decent relationship. You say she never did anything for us, and that I don't change, but that's wrong- she did plenty, I have changed and continue to change in the ways that are right for me, just not the ways that you would pick for your own desires. I guess this is life, how it goes on, how we find the end of our path. You may understand the strength of my love and the depth of my sadness at this time which seems like the end, but you'll never return it.
You yourself have said you're incapable. I will go on. I started to grow as I opened my eyes, and I continued to try despite the stacked deck, and I willingly gave so much for so little in return. Tolerance is not love. A room mate is not a spouse. We had to separate to gain our own strength and build our own lives, I'm just sorry that it has to end on such a sour note.
In time I hope you'll understand things from my perspective, I think I've given you all the pieces of my story, and if you can get over yourself long enough to put them together, you'll understand why I'm not apologizing this time, why I'm not begging forgiveness and trying to bend over backwards to be different so that I can hurry up and show you that I'm changing in the direction you want me to change.
You said I'm incapable of change, that I don't desire change- that's true of some parts of me, but not others. Can you really pick any particular part of you and change it for me? Why can't you take that part that doesn't show any kind of love or affection or even encouragement, and change that? Why can't you take that part of you that looks to me for so much, and change that?
It was a start that you began to go days, weeks, months between unleashing your venom on me, but it's like I said- tolerance is not love, and a room mate is not a spouse. I also said this before, to you, that we will both have to change and still have a long way to go before we can have any hope of making this work. I'll be here, will you? Grannys wanting foreign dating couple looking Warners Bay man white male looking for a black woman for friends with benifits looking for a great friend with benefits Beware w4m I got to her hotel and was rob by 4 blk guys.
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